As some readers may know, in addition Twentysomewhat, I have my own photoblog: Something Completely Different. As a means of cross promotion--not to mention getting more mileage from the same content--I'll inform you when I post new photos. And, low and behold, I have a new photo titled "Epiphany." Check it out! Comments appreciated. More >
Monday, January 7, 2008
Saturday, January 5, 2008
Jesus Birds, Beware! Meet Jesus Cat
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Huckabee and Jacko both drink "Jesus Juice"
According a 2005 story on NewsBusters, Michael Jackson:
[Michael] Jackson referred to wine by [the term "Jesus Juice"] in allegedly attempting to seduce young boys.Yep, that Michael Jackson, trying to seduce young boys using wine.
Next, from a 2007 story in theLA Times:
"I drink a different kind of Jesus juice," Huckabee said.Yep, that Mike Huckabee,trying to seduce
What other ways are Michael Jackson and Michael Huckabee the same? Comments are open! More >
Really Weird Fish(es)
As one may have guessed from the title, this story is an excuse to post a video of Radiohead's song Weird Fishes/Arpeggi from In Rainbows:
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Thursday, January 3, 2008
Red State Update: Jackie Goes Negative
Two Boobless Hours
Author's note: If you find the title either senseless or offensive, you need simply to watch more Family Guy and all will become hillariously clear. (I tried to embed the clip, only to find it pulled from YouTube. Thanks, Fox.)
Review: Citizen Kane
For certain film buffs, myself included, the American Film Institute's annual CBS specials celebrating "100 Years, 100 ______" are an occasion matched only by Christmas and birthdays. 2007's list was particularly interesting in that it threw out the previous list of top 100 American Movies, added more recent fare to the mix, and re-voted. Hello Lord of the Rings, goodbye Doctor Zhivago. The most interesting aspect of the list was that while many films' rankings rose, fell, debuted, or disappeared, Citizen Kane remained number one. With that much acclaim on its shoulders, I finally felt I had no recourse but to track down a copy at the library and see what all the fuss is about.
In case you hadn't heard, Citizen Kane is the story of Charles Foster Kane (Orson Welles), a man taken from his parents at an early age to lead a life of prestige and luxury, eventually becoming a newspaper publishing tycoon. What makes the movie so unique, notable, and enduring is how it tells Kane's story: start with a man's dying word, "Rosebud" and then follow a reporter's journey to assemble the puzzle of Kane's life to see what could be important enough to occupy the last thoughts of one so powerful.
For those who have no idea who or what Rosebud is, stop what you're doing and go rent this movie lest the ending get spoiled for you. Tragically, pop culture has been conspiring against the uninitiated and Rosebud has been referenced everywhere from children's fare like Peanuts and Animaniacs to classic TV such as Cheers-- Frasier once spoiled the ending to everyone in earshot. Regardless of the hype, the twist holds a psychological wonder equal to the endings of The 6th Sense and Planet of the Apes (and much like those films, the clues are there all along if you're looking for them).
A movie can't live on its twist ending alone (you don't see The Crying Game on the AFI list) and Citizen Kane realizes this, packing a deep and satisfying story in between its Rosebudded bookends. Wells, doing triple duty as director and co-screenwriter, helps pioneer the technique of putting actors through varying stages of aging makeup to span events across decades, a technique later adopted by Forrest Gump and A Beautiful Mind, among others. The cast handles this marvelously; every late in life characterization makes the viewer desire to see how they came to be the way they are.
The story's themes of power overshadowing responsibility and the need to be loved overshadowing sanity serve as both reflections of historical figures such as William Randolph Hearst and Howard Hughes and inspirations for great entertainment to come such as Spiderman and The Office (Michael Scott = Charles Kane – money. Think about it.) Technically, Wells' innovative camera work, editing, and use of focus are still inspiring directors like David Fincher and Quentin Tarantino.
While its worthiness to be declared Best American Film Of All Time will surely be debated for the duration of history, there is no denying that few films will ever influence culture and move audiences quite like Citizen Kane continues to do, over 65 years after its release, and that alone merits a high status on anyone's list.
Paul's Grade: A
On an unrelated note, this trailer represents a strange trend I have noticed in vintage films: trailers that violate the 4th wall and serve a function closer to what modern audiences might expect from a DVD featurette. I might blog more on it later. It'll help me get over the scars sustained from hearing an old-timey studio suit referring to Miracle on 34th Street as "groovey". Ugh.
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Slightly less stupid person
John, you were right on the money about that last tatoo being a janktacular mess, but the nerdiest dark corners of my brain just won't let me think that this tat isn't utterly rad:
C'mon! Boba Fett! And the glassy smooth plane of back fat makes the details on Cloud City just pop.
More >Stupid People: A New Feature
After my chiding of stupid drunk British youth, I have decided that posting pictures of stupid people is an easy way to generate content. Here is my first installment:
I have no desire to get a tattoo. Never have, and hopefully, never will. I don't necessarily have anything against those who do get inked, provided it's discrete and intellegent. A former co-worker of mine had a slightly misshapen red asterisk on her wrist. When I asked her about it, she informed me with an air of annoyance that it was obviously the Red Hot Chili Pepper's logo. I begged to differ, but didn't feel like making an issue of it. Now, that was a stupid thing to have tattooed on your wrist. A logo for a band which doesn't routinely use said logo on their albums. Yeah, you're cool. But such idiocy doesn't even begin to compare to this:
Three letters: WTF? The thought process behind this seems to be:
"I love my daughter, my country, and Star Wars, but how to express these loves to other people? I know, I'll get a mural of the death star being blown up with my daughter's name at the top. And in the center I can have an American flag pattern in a pair of hands. Aww, what the hell, why not throw in a ankh as well--to show my spiritual side. Now, just in case people can't tell what's represented or which I care most about, I'll have a list of the elements according to order of importance."
Hat tip to The GinBlog.
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Wednesday, January 2, 2008
Shame on You! British Youth Collectively Celebrate New Year, Vomit in Gutters
When I was a teenager, I discovered the classic comic strip Andy Capp. Aided by bulbous nose, 3' height, and cockney accent, Andy Capp showed us the lighter side of English drunkenness, poverty, and spousal abuse. The charm of Andy Capp lies in the friendly exaggeration of certain cultural perceptions.
And this year, we get to see the basis for those perceptions. The British have shown themselves to be a nation of drunks on New Years and there is nothing charming about these lads or lasses. The Daily Mail has a story reporting that emergency services recieved ambulence calls every eight seconds on New Year's Eve. According to a Belgian girl visiting England:
"At 9pm I saw people throwing up - England is totally different to Belgium."Most of us would happily join with her, assuming there was no risk of a chest stabbing. Neverthless, this is no laughing matter. According to a 2004 article in the New York Times:
"The whole evening I have been watching English girls wearing dresses that only just cover their underwear. They zig-zag through the streets in their tiny skirts."
"Even though I haven't drunk tonight I have had such fun laughing at all the drunken English people."
"Binge drinking is now so routine that young people find it difficult to explain why they do it," a recent Home Office report said.Perhaps they should investigate the link between alcoholism and short term memory loss?
Now unlike Andy Capp, these young people are idiots who need help. Now we can laugh at caricatures of snooty Frenchman--the beret, the complete neglect of the use of soap and water, smoking like a chimney--while knowing that most Frenchman are quite normal, aside from their outraaaagous accents. But when we laugh at these drunken Brits, it isn't a stereotype. This is England.
I have no clue what to do about it. Close the pubs earlier? A nationwide advertising campaign along the lines of "Don't Drink Yourself Stupid, Ya Ale-Soaked Bints!"? Or perhaps an high profile series on the telly with stars who are exemplars of moderation and sexiness.
On a closing note, I present this picture:
What in the name of decency, fashion, and common sense possessed these girls to leave the house only wearing scarves? The low for the day was 41 degrees Fahrenheit. This indicates to me that these gals weren't very sharp to begin with. Or perhaps their alcohol fueled brains decided their bodies were far too hot to be covered up and therefore they ought to shed those unnecessary shirts and sweaters or dresses. And who needs pants? You've gotta let those flabby buttocks breathe! More >
How to Defeat Communism Without Really Trying
Review: Charlie Wilson's War
The movies exist to bring people together in the communal act of laughing, crying, and screaming together. Politics exist to drive people apart in the tribal act of laughing, crying, and screaming at each other. So when Hollywood tries bringing Capitol Hill insight to the multiplex, the results are seldom pretty.
Nearly all political movies fall into two categories: those that stick to a specific credo and proceed to ram it in your face (see the recent failure of Lions For Lambs or the bizarre rantings of Oliver Stone’s JFK), and those like Mr. Smith Goes to Washington and Dave that take an airy, idealistic stance that seldom goes deeper than “ain’t America grand!” While the latter are often an enjoyable and uplifting experience, you can’t claim to have learned much about what makes the USA tick.
There is, however, a rare and wonderful middle ground: movies that put quality first, but at the same time enrich the viewer via some degree of depth regarding history, politics, war, and life. Dr. Strangelove was one of those movies, as were M*A*S*H, Platoon, and Wag the Dog. Now as America begins to put the events of the last decade into perspective, the excellent Charlie Wilson’s War is well poised to join their ranks.
Building on Mike Nichols’ solid directing and Aaron Sorkin’s brisk, witty screenplay, Tom Hanks robustly embodies real life congressman Charlie Wilson who, in the early 1980s, found himself an unlikely co-conspirator in a secret effort to fund Afghani rebels in their fight against the Soviet Union, paving the way to the end of the Cold War. Along for the ride are Phillip Seymour Hoffman as a hilariously blunt CIA analyst and Julia Roberts as an irascible socialite who seems to believe that she can defeat communism through the sheer force of her fundraising dinner parties.
Charlie Wilson is a hard drinking womanizer whose greatest accomplishment throughout six terms in congress is “getting reelected five times” but during a bout of coke addled hot tubbing in Vegas, a news report about the futile efforts of the mujahideen to repel their oppressors catches his eye, leading Charlie to flex his power on a defense appropriations committee to lend them a hand. The escalation that follows is a stranger than fiction ride through black ops, tenuous international relations, and stunning echoes of what Afghanistan would become in the years leading up to 9/11.
And did I mention that it’s really funny? Buoyed by its sense of humor and dependably top notch performances from its stars, Charlie Wilson entertains, teaches, and gives a wide range of insights to ponder, all while clocking in at an effortless 97 minutes with no time left over to get preachy or sluggish. With its slew of Golden Globe nominations, Charlie is sure to stay visible throughout awards season. And as long as there are teachers in the world as cool as the ones I’ve had, it should earn immortality as a great way to spend a couple periods in high school and collge history classes. Don’t miss it.
Grade: A-
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Tuesday, January 1, 2008
Tired of being conned by the WGA strike?
Paul mentioned below the anime Death Note. Here's a little treat from across the pond which should mitigate the awfulness of American reality TV: The Real Hustle. The premise is professional con men show you how to perform various scams on others--presumably as a means to protect the innocent from falling prey to true shysters. Think Ocean's Eleven, except instead of robbing Andy Garcia, they're swindling shlubs like you. Take a peek below. For more follow the link (since it's on YouTube, who knows how long it'll be up):
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